Ärtzin

I was “able to experience another "first" in Germany.  I had a “welcome committee” come pay me a visit this week.  One that I had hoped wouldn’t come visit or at least wait a year or so before knocking on my door.  At first, I wasn’t sure whom this stranger was that knocked oh so loudly.  But after a bit, the name was revealed- “3 Tag Deutsch-Virus” which translates in English to “good ole' nasty bug”.  The “welcome committee” had an agenda and didn’t care about any of my previous appointments or responsibilities.  It was insistent that I experience being “sick” in a foreign country in full.  On the agenda: meeting the local doctor and a visit to the Apotheke.  I am glad this Virus didn’t seem to want to meet any of the other Hoff family members.  Thanks to this now departed new friend, I have experienced being sick in a foreign country and can add this to my living as an expat blog.  

Even in the U.S., I avoid going to the doctor until I am at the point of not being able to function.  So imagine my fear when the realization that I could not win this little war inside my body without the help of a doctor.  That would be “Artze” here in Germany if you were seeing a male doctor or “Ärtzin” if it is a female doctor.  After spending a good portion of ‘day one’ searching thru lists of “English speaking” doctors, then trying to figure out where in the city they were located (you can easily find yourself driving over an hour to get to a certain area around Stuttgart not to mention any traffic you may encounter) and finally trying to figure out what the messages on their voicemail translated to in English.  It was all too overwhelming just to find a doctor, while feeling rotten, so I decided to just hang up the DOC visit.  I was lucky enough after giving up on the whole doctor thing.  You are wondering ….”Why didn’t she just ask someone”.  Well, let me answer….Most of the parents that I know at the kid’s school speak German and therefore don’t need a “English Speaking” doctor.  As I sat on a swing watching the kids play on their playground at school and hoped for a miracle.  It happened, simultaneously, Jason showed up at the kid’s school and Cooper’s teacher (who is a local) whisked me off to her Ärtzin and was able to “get me in”.  Being sick in a foreign country is not easy for a number of reasons, but today I will stick to the reasons based on the differences in the Medical worlds of U.S. compared to Germany.….

Differences observed at the Doctor’s Office

•   Doctor’s offices are open very limited hours on certain days.  
•   Be prepared, no matter how sick you are, to say, "Grüss Gott!" (Swabish way of saying hello) every time someone new comes into the waiting area.
•  Getting an appointment at a doctor’s office is very hierarchal and is based on the type of Insurance you carry.  The two types of insurance are “Public or Private” I still don’t understand all the difference on this topic but I am glad we have private.
•  I know you will miss it, but don’t expect to sit on the end of an exam table with paper crinkling every time you move, in a blue paper gown while the doctor examines you.  I sat at a DESK across from her.
• Don’t spend the whole 30 minutes in the waiting room translating your symptoms into German; this will only offend the doctor.
• Don’t expect the doctor to conform to the “Patient Bill of Rights”- there isn’t one.  Please just do as the doctor says…(which in my case was “please don’t go to work tomorrow”)
• When you are leaving, DO NOT stand at the counter waiting to pay the co-pay.  If you do, be prepared for the doctor to turn around and say, “You aren’t in America, we will send you a bill

Then a trip to the Apotheka

•  In Germany, only pharmacies (Apotheka) have the right to sell medicine. (you won’t find any medicine in Walmart here ….or Walmart for that matter)
• ALL the medicines including non-prescription are “behind the counter”
• The Apotheker will tell you it is his job “to provide you with pharmacological advice” and will spend as much time helping as needed despite the long line of people waiting to see him.
• A friend explained, that often before going to the doctor, go to the Apotheke. It is legal and normal for them to listen to your medical problem, and usually recommend an appropriate ointment or pill to avoid a trip to the doctor.  Hmmm…..if only I had known.
• You will not find dog food, toys, sodas, photo centers etc. at the Apotheke….only medicines.

Medicine even looks different here....

I was glad I went to the doctor.  In addition to the Virus, I had a Sinus infection that required an antibiotic.  (FYI-antibiotics are only prescribed here is absolutely necessary)  On a final note, as the doctor was writing my prescription, she asked if I needed a Strong Pain Medicine prescription.  I guess I looked dumbfounded, which I was, I mean who needs pain medicine for a virus or Sinus infection?   So she asked again, “Do you need a prescription for Pain Medicine, it is called IBUPROFEN?”  I almost laughed as I thought to myself….“Nope, I still have my mega bottle which I purchased WITHOUT a prescription from Costco”.  So, I guess my advice to anyone considering living abroad-Find your doctors before you need them, because I am sure the “Welcoming Committee” will come make a visit to your house too!